If I wanted to be honest, and I'm not sure how honest I want to be in a public forum, I would admit to being a craft supply hoarder. I enjoy craft supplies and have a good quantity of them. I have a craft room that is the size of a normal bedroom which is about 10x12 feet. So that's 120 square feet and it is very full of craft supplies.
I am not loyal to any one craft. I have created and participated in: cross stitch, knitting, sewing, slab pottery, wheel thrown pottery, stained glass, fused glass, oil painting, scrap booking, card making, rubber stamping, book making, pisanka, drawing, mixed media, jewelry making, polymer clay, and probably some others I can't think of right now. I have supplies for each of these crafts. You can see why I need a 120 square foot craft room.
Now keep in mind that this room is not very functional. It is a dangerous mission to get to my work space. How did this happen? The build-up of supplies began when my now 14 year old was a toddler. It began because my fantasy life didn't match my reality.
In my fantasy life, I had plenty of time to create in my craft room. I wasn't working outside the home so therefore those non-working, just stay-at-home mom hours could be managed and I would have a few hours each day to work in my craft room when the little one was sleeping and the other was at school. In addition, I would have at least an hour or two in the evening when daddy took over and mommy had some me time.
In reality, I was exhausted and the real-life needs of my family never corresponded with my 'schedule' of all I would accomplish each day. Lifelong insomnia interfered and I felt less rested than ever. My current toddler (and my previous one) were curious, active, and didn't need near as much sleep as I did evidently. Daddy time didn't always work out due to other necessary chores he needed to do or for the simple fact that everyone relied on mommy to know all the details, schedules, and the location of every item in the household.
So, the whole thing began innocently enough. A trip to the city and a stop at JoAnn's or Michael's could yield some very nice supplies and the sales were fabulous. Keep in mind I lived in a craft supply desert so these shopping trips were only once per month or every other month. Then I discovered E-Bay. Craft supplies in abundance, great prices, unique items, and all delivered to my door.
It didn't take much time to buy an item in comparison to the time needed to actually create with that item. I spent more time collecting supplies than actually using them. They did and still do make me feel happy that I have them to use. When I did go back to work, taking some of my craft supplies for use in my classroom helped me feel a bit better about my "collection''. However, about 5 years ago I faced my reality: I had enough craft supplies.
Revising my outlook meant that when my husband asked if I wanted to stop at my former craft haunts, I simply said, "No, I don't need anything". This was initially met with astonishment and often with him him trying to persuade me to go. It was actually nice to say no.
This revision in my thoughts about craft supplies was directly related to understanding more about God. At some point through sermons and Bible study, I came to understand that I served a God who could supply me with anything I needed or wanted. He was a God of more than enough. One would think that since I had been saved since I was 6 years old that I would have somehow learned this along the way. I had not.
I had not seen the relationship between God and my personal possessions. Yes, I knew I was blessed and knew God provided for me but I had not made the connection between God and my future needs. I had not been trusting God for my future. Not just in craft supplies but for life in general. To overcome my childhood challenges, I had taken on more of the burden of providing for my future than I needed to.
Finally, I was assured that I had enough but also knew that if I really needed something to complete a project, we had enough money that I could buy what I needed or God would provide it some other way. He had shown me this in various areas many times in my life but I had not internalized it.
This revision in thought also had another side. Thankfulness. If I was truly thankful for my craft supplies then wouldn't I take very good care of them and use them as intended? This was a hard pill to swallow. I had always told God thank you and I would have said I was a thankful person. In reality, my actions did not show that I was thankful. Unused craft supplies and limited access to them was a clear indication that I had some rethinking to do.
I have and continue to spend time re-evaluating this area of my life. I have chosen supplies to donate, worked on organization and evaluation of what I have, and actually taken time to create and enjoy my supplies. I have limited new purchases and talk myself out of temptation. Surprisingly, we now have a Hobby Lobby very near by. I have been there to shop only 4 times in the last 8 months and 3 of those times was to get a specific item for a project in progress.
The question of being truly thankful is one I continue to ponder in other areas of my life also. I also continue to consciously make a choice to trust God for my future needs. I also find myself asking if the thing I want fits into my real life now or is it based in a fantasy. Overall, living in the reality of my life makes me a happier and more genuine person.
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