Those may seem simple to some of you, but when you are/have been a wife, mother, teacher, for so long, those things consume your life. Your decisions are always made through those filters and you lose yourself. You put your wants on the back burner in light of what is best for the family, relationship, children, future, security, etc.
I heard recently that to find your bliss you should remember back to your childhood dream. That doesn't help me. I didn't have a childhood dream. My life was just about surviving. Crazy childhood aside, I knew I would go to college as I always felt school was my safe/happy place. I succeeded there and was recognized for my effort. Things were predictable. Effort equaled success.
Now, in mid-life, I have the ability to choose and go after a dream. Only problem is, I don't know what the dream is. I know that somehow it involves using my creativity and problem solving. I love both of these things. I find I get to do these things when I garden, craft, make art, and when I cook.
Teaching used to be more creative than it is now. Testing and data are main drivers of education now. Creativity will get you the data you need but this idea seems lost in the current throes of educational policy. Things that are fun and creative have to be justified and reduced to meet a one sentence objective or standard.
My favorite job when I was going to college was working at a frame shop. I help clients pick out molding or ready-made frames for their paintings, needlework, and photographs. I professioanlly framed their objects. I helped with choosing matting and asked about their style and decor. I sold art supplies. I worked with creative people and creative clients. Everything about the job/the people wasn't perfect, but I did like my job.
I know that whatever job/business I do, it has to have a major creative aspect to it. As of now, that is all I know. I've just begun to ponder the questions above and beyond this, I don't have any answers.
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